


Stay

by arcticfox007



Series: Castiel and Dean: Missed Chances [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, First Kiss, Fix-It of Sorts, Human Castiel (Supernatural), M/M, Sam Winchester mentioned, supernatural season 9
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:07:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27824257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arcticfox007/pseuds/arcticfox007
Summary: Episode 9x3 fix-it.Dean told Cas to leave, but he couldn't just watch him walk away.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: Castiel and Dean: Missed Chances [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2036206
Comments: 3
Kudos: 57





	Stay

**Author's Note:**

> The Supernatural finale was such a disappointment to me so I decided to cheer myself up by writing some December fix-its to times where I thought Cas (and Dean) should have had it better. I'll be posting some more of these over the month.  
> This is my first time sharing fan fiction, I hope you enjoy it.

“You can’t stay here.” 

Castiel had felt so elated to be with Dean and Sam again. They saved him from April, brought him to this bunker they had started to make into a home, and Cas had started to feel that he could really make things work as a human. And the feelings that rushed through him coming back from death with Dean cradling Cas’ face in his hands – Cas had only felt echoes of that when he still had his grace. Human wants and needs were overwhelming and Cas had just been so happy to have the Winchesters find him, but Dean didn’t want him to stay. Cas could feel his face crumpling and he barely registered the things that Dean was saying. Nothing mattered if Dean wanted him to leave. Cas felt crushed.

“Cas?” Dean’s eyes were wide as he looked at his best friend.

“Okay. I’ll go.” He pushed away the money Dean had put in front of him. “I don’t want anything from you.” Cas got up, hoping to get out of there before he started crying. He was having trouble controlling these powerful new human emotions.

“Cas wait, please let me help.” Dean put his hand on Cas’ shoulder as Cas tried to turn his back to the man he loved. Perhaps Dean had only wanted him when he was useful. Now that he was human, he would only be a burden to the Winchesters. Cas pushed Dean’s hand away roughly.

“No. You’ve done enough. Thank you for getting me away from April. I’m sorry to have been so much trouble to you.” Without turning to look at Dean Cas started walking towards the door. As always, the door was deafening as it was opened and then slammed shut.

***  
Dean stood rooted to the spot; hand still outstretched. What had he done? Castiel was his best friend. He loved his brother but Cas… Cas needed Dean. Dean rushed out the door after Cas. It was late and it took a moment for Dean to spot his friend walking down the street, shoulders slumped. Dean ran after him.

“Cas! Please stop. Please- ” Dean caught up to the ex-angel who hadn’t stopped walking. Dean grabbed Cas’ arm out of desperation to stop him from walking away. “Please wait Cas!” Cas still wouldn’t look at him. 

“Let me go Dean.” Cas’ voice was different and Dean realized in horror that Cas had tears running down his face. Dean couldn’t stand it, he had hurt his friend, the person who had given up everything for him, when Cas needed him the most. Dean pulled Castiel towards him and wrapped his arms around him, refusing to let go. 

“No. Please just listen. I want you here, I do. I did something – something I don’t know if it was right, but I had to save Sammy. I helped Ezekiel possess him without Sam knowing because Sam was dying, he was ready to give up and leave me.” Dean gasps raggedly. “But if you stay Zeke will leave Sam, and Sam will die. But I think if I let you leave part of me will be gone instead…” Now Dean could feel tears running down his face as well. His throat felt swollen, he couldn’t get any more words out. He didn’t know what to do, but he wouldn’t let go of Cas. He couldn’t. Cas pulled back, but didn’t step away, searching Dean’s face.

“Dean, you said Ezekiel healed him. I wish you had just told me.” Cas shook his head. “Why would he care if I stayed here if he’s just trying to help Sam? Sam needs to know what happening to him, surely you know this?” Dean took a painful breath and rested his forehead on Cas’ brow, closing his eyes.

“I know man, but if Sammy kicks Zeke out, it’s over. He’s gone. I just – I just couldn’t lose him. I’m scared Cas.” Cas just let Dean hold him as the sounds of the night washed over them both. After a moment, or an eternity, Dean lifted up his head and looked into Cas’ insanely blue eyes. “I’m sorry Cas. He told me if you didn’t go, he would.” His words were painfully whispered through clenched teeth.

“Dean. I will do whatever you need me to do. Always.” Cas reached up and tentatively put his hand on the side of Dean’s face. Dean leaned into the touch, hardly knowing what he was doing. He had felt so alone, so desperate, and when he had thought Cas was dead mere hours ago – he had known for awhile now that Cas was more to him than just his best friend. What Dean needed right now was for Castiel to know what he meant to him, for Cas to know that he was valued and cherished and that Dean never wanted to kick him out into the cold world alone. Dean felt a sudden surge of bravery, of determination, and he found himself staring right back at Cas, into that endless sea of blue. 

“I want you to stay. I want to find a way for you to stay. I don’t want to watch you leave anymore; I need you to know – I -” Dean struggled to get out the words. He was terrible with words. So, instead, he leaned slowly towards Cas giving him every chance to step away. He saw something indescribable shimmering in Cas’ eyes as the ex-angel closed the last of the space between them, and then their lips were pressed together and Dean could no longer imagine a world in which kissing Cas wasn’t as necessary as breathing. 

***  
The feeling of Dean’s lips on his – it was like he had wings again. Cas hadn’t felt like this with Meg or April. This was worth defying Heaven. He never wanted it to end. Unfortunately, breathing was fairly important now that he was human. Both of them were breathing heavily by the time they broke apart. Dean was staring into his eyes and all Cas could think was, he wants me to stay.

“I need you Cas.” Dean’s voice was soft, but sure. Cas smiled softly.

“I love you too, Dean.” Dean kissed Cas again and then grabbed his hand. 

“Please come back. We will talk to Zeke and if he won’t stay with you here, I’ll find somewhere we can both go but still say close enough to watch out for Sam.” Cas nodded seriously and followed Dean back into the bunker. Being human would be manageable, maybe even beautiful, as long as Cas had Dean.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm always open to constructive criticism, but as I'm doing this for fun please be kind. Kudos are appreciated if you enjoyed the story!


End file.
